Change

  To say last week was stressful would be an understatement.  No nothing major went wrong with the house, the car, work, Chloe's school, etc.  But we changed daycares for the boys 2 weeks ago and what I thought would be a great transition has turned into a nightmare.  I visited this place prior to the move, spoke with the director and explained both kiddos needs, especially our 4yr old who has a special diet and is new to potty training.  I was meet with yes, we can help with potty training and we will comply with his special diet and I left feeling good about this.  You see the other place they were attending was a bit of a hike for the social workers to drive to get them for visits because it was up a mountain and I also questioned how the roads would be in the winter but they never flinched at a special request, they bought all new food and changed their menu to help out with his special diet.   The class sizes were smaller and he received  more attention.  Now I leave him for 2 hours so I can do yoga and he has gone through three changes of clothes, I am finding that they tell me one thing, tell the social worker another thing and do neither.  If he was mine I would have pulled him out and gave them a piece of my mind, but I can't do that.  So now we are faced with finding him an aid to accompany him to daycare and finding a new place for both boys.  

  I am not delusional enough to think he is an easy kid.  I worked in daycare throughout high school and when I was first married and even went back by request of my employer for a little bit after chloe was born, I have potty trained numerous children, worked with autistic kids, kids with down syndrome and as a Dental hygienist I have had many MR and special needs patients both children and adults.  One thing I can tell you is kids, special needs or not,  can smell fear and can find weakness and buttons to push.  So because they have labeled him as autistic and trouble now, Kayden is not being taken care of properly.  He is a very intelligent little boy, can tell you all his numbers, letter, colors, shapes, remembers how to get places, like church or the grocery store and can open any door he is presented with.  He has figured out that the teachers are afraid to be firm with him and he uses tantrums and peeing his pants for attention.  This is a kid who can go all weekend with maybe one or two accidents and that is with us running around and doing errands and going to church and playing outside but yet he is at daycare for a few hours and has numerous accidents.  I know he is new to potty training and he will say, "I need to go potty" when he is in trouble or doesn't want to do something but even on his worst day, his biggest fit he has never purposefully peed on himself.  So I am at a loss, I cannot stay home with him all the time, honestly I love my job, and we need my pay check.  So there are lots of prayers going up on this subject, what to do with him, where he should go, etc.  

  He is not by any means a trouble kid.  He is very sweet and active and for the most part acts like every other four year old boy.  It breaks my heart to think of him not being properly taken care of.  I know they look at him and see a happy healthy four year old boy with some behavioral issues and when it comes to the potty issue I don't think they totally get that just 4

mos ago he was in full diapers with serious tummy issues. And now a month into potty training and 3wks into full under he does have some issues but what kid doesn't.  He needs to be celebrated for the leaps and bounds he has accomplished not punished for not meeting their standards.  

  So we are still in limbo, pretty much told by the current daycare he cannot return after the 30th of this month and trying to find him the help he needs plus a safe and understanding place for him to go during the day.  That has been the most stressful part of this whole thing trying to figure out care and services for him.  But we will keep plugging along and hopefully get this little guy the help he needs and deserves.