Progress

  It has been almost 10wks since I started on this journey to compete in my first bikini competition.  Looking back it has been a roller coaster ride for sure, a series of ups and downs and fast turns.  Four weeks  in I hired a coach to help me with diet and a weight lifting  program along with posing and all the other stuff that comes with this.  I check in with her weekly with pictures and weight and any issues I may be having and she helps me adjust things.  I have also been blessed to be in touch with an old neighbor of ours that competes in figure competitions and coaches also.  She has been wonderful and has offered tremendous help and support in this whole process.  I went and watched a show this past weekend that she was judging.  Very interesting and fun to see how it all flows and goes together.  Now mind you this show was on a much smaller scale than the one I am going to be in but I walked away with a good insight on what the judges are looking for. Not just body condition but over all appearance & stage presence is very important. 

  I have my suit designed, my theme wear figured out, jewelry purchased and I have my hair and make-up set up.  Still figuring out the whole tanning situation but I have a suggestion on who to use just need to make the call.  I have my nail appointment set up and was lucky enough to be sponsored by my local salon - Tanglz Color Bar!!  I have been amazed at the support both financial & verbal during all this. 

  To say it's been a rough road is an understatement.  The gym has been the easiest part of it all.  I have no issue going to the gym and pushing my self.  I don't need someone there to hold my hand I am hard enough on myself, I won't settle for less than last time.  I push it but am careful to listen to my body. It's one thing to push my limits but it's another thing to break past them. This is a goal & a tough one for sure but it is not worth my health or long term damage to muscle or bone.  I am already dealing with a small injury from a fall almost a year ago where apparently I broke my fibula, it healed perfectly but some flex moves bother it. I have found that kesio tape helps big time. 

    The diet has been the toughest part by far.   I joked with a co-worker the other day that I was over chicken and fish & just wanted a steak and a beer.  She said she would have that steak and beer with me come the end of May.  This is more mental than physical for sure, thinking I can actually do this, I can get my body in shape, and giving up time at home to go to the gym, can I pass on that yummy food for chicken and fish again.  And the answer is yes, yes I can.  I have struggled through way tougher situations than this in the past, deployments, illnesses, college while maintaining a home and family (sometimes alone while Trav was deployed), marital troubles, family shunning, moving to new places and the list goes on and on.  I am strong I am powerful and I can do whatever I put my mind to with God's help. 

  The other issue I have struggled with in all this is the modesty aspect.  I am not super shy but I am not showy in what I wear for the most part.  I think being short helps, not a lot of skirts or dresses end up short on me.  I do wear swim suits but try to be mindful of my audience.  I strongly believe we as women have a duty to project ourselves in a becoming way.  And as a married woman I believe some things are for my husbands eyes only.  If everyone gets to see you in a certain why how then can it be special for your spouse. Yes, I will step onto stage in the tiniest of tiny bikinis but I will be in a place that is somewhat appropriate for that.  I do want to use this experience as a motivator for other women, to show what is possible with hard work & determination and to show what I can do with God's help. 

Like a gold ring in a pig's snout

is a beautiful woman without discretion

Proverbs 11:22